Emphasizing and celebrating that which is usually obscured.
Autistic traits - our stims, tics, laughs, facial and bodily expressions - that people might find weird are quite often obscured. This is an integral part of masking. Also takes a toll on our mental health, because these behaviors are second nature to us.
Radical visibility deals with unabashedly laying claim to these aspects of our autistic personalities and feeling proud of the ways in which we present. It is also using attire and accessories as a conscious extension of who we are.
To a large extent, at various different points in our lives we've fought hard to be radically visible. Whether or not we've been able to sustain it is a different matter. I've done it by continuing to work hard on 'being myself' in the face of clear resistance from neurotypical-led ideas, settings, and ways of presentation, such as in work groups and client circles.
For a long time I was naive and believed I would get away with it, that people would eventually see things my way. I guess a lot of us do that. But I can't zero in on that exact point in time when I started to see that this might not be as easy as I think. That getting a whole majority to change the way they see the world and do things doesn't come very easily.
And that despite putting up a strong fight, I would have to cave.
Not that the fight to be radically visible has ended. In fact with Spectrum, it has only become more intense. But there are still aspects that I don't quite understand.
Like clothing and accessorizing, for example.
I don't think I quite get how to incorporate this aspect of radical visibility into my daily life. I go for comfort wear mainly, but there's situations in that necessitate a strict dress code, like meetings, presentations, sometimes shoots. Earlier I'd wear an undershirt, a shirt and a pair of simple jeans to work. But of late I've been doing just a simple cotton t shirt and a pair of loose jeans.
While this is comfortable, it's also generic. I don't know if it brings out my personality, but I don't even know what beyond this simple attire could really reflect my personality. Don't know if my personality warrants any more. I like t shirts with quirky messages on them, which I wear every now and then. But I don't know if I want to venture beyond jeans to, say, shorts or leggings or trousers. Maybe trousers and a t shirt, because they're loose and airier than jeans, but what beyond that, if at all?
Sometimes I want to accessorise, because why not? Dad got both his ears pierced last year, at age 64. I've been meaning to too, but just hasn't happened. So maybe earrings then? Or a nose ring? Or a tattoo? Maybe all three? All I feel I keep oscillating between is a thick beard and a clean shaven look when the hair starts getting itchy.
Besides, I don't think my fashion sense really extends beyond the basics of everyday wear. And it's comfort-led, which means comfort is prioritized in the things I wear. Also, getting your hands on quirky stuff means spending a lot of time looking for quirky things, which, honestly, I don't have the time or patience for.
But I'm going to work on this aspect. I'm going to mix and match, I'm going to get a lot more experimental and see what works for me and what doesn't. I'm going to stretch the boundaries of what I think fashion means for me just up until the point where it starts to affect my comfort level with the clothes I choose.
So while prioritizing comfort, seeing what from my wardrobe goes well with what else. Might post pictures. But mostly will not. Let's see.
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